What I said at Pride

Handmade heart shaped ornament with glass mosaic design. Tiles are diamond shaped with rainbow stripe across the middle.

[These remarks were shared at the Valley Wide Pride Festival (Hudson, WI) on June 22nd of this year. They were adapted some for this post.]

Good morning, friends! It is my privilege to help kick off the 2nd Valley Wide Pride. I am going to start with a brief story because stories connect us and speak to our souls. I have number of titles in my life including: pastor, artist, queer woman, partner, sister, friend. One of my most cherished titles is, “Auntie.” So last weekend, I made a trip to see my goddaughter, Lola. She will be turning 6 this week so clearly, we needed to party. This year, the party was mostly adults: parents, grandparents, aunties, a few family friends. Lola specifically asked that her friend, Matt, be invited to the party because they are “chosen family,” in her words. Matt is the kiddo of close family friends. I remember them being at all Lola’s previous parties.

Well, Matt showed up with their parents and was spectacularly dressed in a black mini-dress with a sash and black heals. As far as I could observe, Lola did not question Matt in anyway-though this was the first time Lola saw them in a dress. In short order, both were off to play. My favorite moment was they pulled chairs up side-by-side and were reading something together away from the adults gathered at the food table. Matt took a break from heels at one point when they played lawn games but announced the heels were needed again later as one must, “Enter and leave in style.”

Friends, (I know I am biased) but we need more Lola’s in the world. I also appreciate the courage and trust Matt had in their friend, Lola. We need more gentle souls who don’t insist on asking prying questions, who welcome preferred names and pronouns, who pay more attention to the contents of one’s heart and character rather than the outer wrappings and other details.

As of (this past) Tuesday, the ACLU is currently tracking 522 anti-LGBTQ+ bills at varying levels of government legislation in our country. To bring it closer to home, they are tracking 14 bills in Wisconsin and 18 in Minnesota. Regardless of whether they pass or are defeated, ALL of these bills are harmful to our LGBTQ+ community and are motivated by hate. Pride is needed now more than ever. I dream of a world where my goddaughter Lola’s compassionate and gentle welcome is the norm. However, I am painfully aware that is not the world we live in. Until the world is this consistently caring and kind to the queer community, we very much need Pride to keep celebrating and uplifting each other.

There is a verse in the book of Psalms, made up primarily of poems and prayers which I think speaks to this Pride moment. The writer in chapter 30 is addressing God and says, “You changed my mourning into dancing. You took off my funeral clothes and dressed me up in joy.” To me, this sums up Pride. There is plenty to celebrate--we no longer live in the years of the Stonewall rebellion and early gay rights movement. There is also plenty to grieve and organize against--we will not let our community be made invisible or criminalized simply for existing.

In the end, Pride is more than the glitter, rainbows, outfits and parades.

Pride is the conscious decision to be wholly one’s-self in community.

And welcome all others as wholly them-selves in community, too.

I offer this blessing for our on-going Pride efforts:

When the glitter and paint have faded,

The rainbow garb has been tossed in a heap on the floor

And June yields to the harsh midsummer, Remember this:

You are loved, you are enough, you are beautiful in all your queerness.

You belong here. You make the world a better place.

And remember, Pride is a noun but also an action and a way of being in the world.

Be Pride wherever you go, making safe space for others and uplifting queer joy and voices.

Embody Pride on the inside and out: extending welcome and grace to yourself and others.

With that, Welcome to Valley Wide Pride! May our day together be filled with joy, welcome,  and community. Happy Pride to you all!